A little "f" friend vs A big "F" friend

A little "f" friend: identifies themselves when they call.
A big "F" Friend: doesn't have to.
A little "f" friend: opens a conversation with a full news bulletin on their life.
A big "F" Friend: says, "What's new with you?"
A little "f" friend: thinks the problems you whine about are recent.
A big "F" Friend: says, "You've been whining about the same thing for 14 years. Get off your duff and do something about it."
A little "f" friend: has never seen you cry.
A big "F" Friend: has shoulders soggy from your tears.
A little "f" friend: doesn't know your parent's first names.
A big "F" Friend: has your parent's phone numbers in their address book.
A little "f" friend: brings a bottle of wine to your party.
A big "F" Friend: comes early to help you cook and stays late to help you clean.
A little "f" friend: hates it when you call after they have gone to bed.
A big "F" Friend: welcomes your call day or night.
A little "f" friend: seeks to talk with you about your problems
A big "F" Friend: seeks to help you with your problems
A little "f" friend: wonders about your romantic history.
A big "F" Friend: could blackmail you with it.
A little "f" friend: when visiting, act like a guest.
A big "F" Friend: when visiting, open your refrigerator, boss your kids around and sass your husband.
A little "f" friend: thinks the friendship is over when you argue.
A big "F" Friend: knows that a friendship's not a friendship until after you've had a fight.
A little "f" friend: expects you to always be there for them.
A big "F" Friend: expects to always be there for you!